Former Nigerian military president Ibrahim Badamasi Babangida has shared intimate details about his marriage to his late wife, Maryam, including her conversion to Islam, in his newly published memoir, A Journey in Service.
The book, released on Thursday in conjunction with a fundraiser for his presidential library, offers a glimpse into their romance, tracing its roots from their early days in Kaduna to their life together as a married couple.
Babangida remembered meeting Maryam, formerly known as Maria Okogwu, in their younger years when they both resided in the unmarried officers' quarters on Kanta Road, Kaduna.
He was captivated by her beauty, describing her as "stunning" and noting her enchanting smile.
Their bond remained strong despite his military training abroad in India and the UK, and he would frequently visit her at the home of his close friend and cousin, Garba Duba.
At the age of 28, after narrowly escaping death in combat, Babangida chose to establish a permanent residence.
While recuperating from a chest injury at Lagos University Teaching Hospital, he pondered over his relationships and came to the realization that he wanted to marry Maryam.
He said, “Before I was discharged from the hospital, I had decided to marry Maria, and as soon as I was released, I headed to Kaduna, where she lived with her mother and uncle. I was eager to share the news with her: I had made up my mind that we were meant to spend the rest of our lives together. I admired her greatly for her calm and composed nature, as well as her good upbringing.
I had made it clear to her that I wouldn't accept a negative response and was optimistic that my efforts would pay off. I consider myself fortunate, and I still do, as I was bold in my approach. At first, Maria had serious doubts about my suitability as a potential partner.
She was aware of my reputation as a socialite, and these were not the characteristics she desired in a husband. She had doubts about my ability to be responsible, and many people shared these reservations with her.
General Babangida stated that faith played a central role in his life, and he required Maryam to convert to Islam before they could get married.
He notes that this was not challenging for Maryam, who had been exposed to both Christian and Muslim influences through her family.
I shared with her that my faith is a fundamental and crucial part of my life and that I would need her to convert to Islam.
Praise be to God; this was not a difficult decision for Maria. Being of both Christian and Muslim heritage and already living in a Muslim home, it was never going to be entirely unfamiliar ground for her.
"He found it relatively simple to adjust to married life as a Muslim," he stated.
Babangida also assured her that he would not have multiple wives, a decision he believed had contributed to their strong marriage.
The couple were married on September 6, 1969, and had four children: Aisha, Muhammad, Aminu, and Halima.
Maryam passed away from ovarian cancer in Los Angeles on December 27, 2009, at the age of 61.
Babangida acknowledged that coping without her had been challenging but said that memories of their life together had brought him comfort.
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